Bonus: Hackocratic Oath
Sept. 22, 2016
I swear by Eris, Goddess of Chaos, Discordia, and all other Gods above, making them my witnesses, that, according to my ability and judgement, I will keep this Oath and this contract:
To hold those who taught me this art equally dear to me as my friends, to share the Net with them, and to fulfill all their needs for data when required; to look upon their offspring as equals to my own friends, and to teach them this art, if they shall wish to learn it, without fee or contract.
By the set rules, lectures, cat content, and every other mode of instruction, I will impart a knowledge of the art to my own offspring, and those of my friends, and to students bound by this contract and having sworn this Oath to the Hacker Ethic, but to no others.
I will use those data regimens which will benefit my users according to my greatest ability and judgement, and I will do no harm or injustice to them. I will not give a lethal malware to anyone if I am asked, nor will I advise such a plan; and similarly I will not give a computer a rootkit. In purity and according to divine law will I carry out my life and my art.
I will not develop crypto algorithms, but I will leave this to those who are trained in this craft.
Into whatever networks I go, I will enter them for the benefit of the users, avoiding any voluntary act of impropriety or corruption, including hurtful comments towards users or hackers, whether they are online or offline.
Whatever I see or hear in the lives of my patients, whether in connection with my professional practice or by way of leaks, which ought to be private, I will keep faithfully secret.
So long as I maintain this Oath faithfully and without corruption, may it be granted to me to partake of life fully and the practice of my art, gaining the respect of all for all time. However, should I transgress this Oath and violate it, may the opposite be my fate.